Directors..pls note!!

Apart from all the hype about Shah Rukh Khan's six pack abs, he looks sick in the song in which he flaunts it. Better keep your shirt on Khan.
The dialogue..'Picture abhi bakhi hai' has been wonderfully used in the end before the credits roll. For once, the audience sits down till the credits finishes at the end of the movie.
For all the stardom that the stars take away after a movie, all those people who work in the background go absolutely unnoticed. Full marks to Farah Khan to showcase every one of the crew member who worked in the film.
After a film is made with team work.
Keep it up..
Directors, better learn from it.

The Haneef Saga

Dr.Mohammed Haneef has become a household name in India and Australia now. His experience will haunt the countless number of Muslims living abroad. Haneef said in an interview after his release that the Australian police had asked him if he had been to Pakistan and Afghanistan and whether he had undergone any weapons training? So the point is, if Haneef had been a Pakistani or Afghanistani, he would have been framed in a serious manner than what had now happened, even if he was just an ordinary person living in either of the countries. The point that the Western nations and countries like Australia do not understand is that not all Muslims are Terrorists and not all Terrorists are Muslims.
Well, its no justification that two Muslims only plotted the failed bombing at the Glasgow airport. Nobody has the right to take another's life.
Ok, Haneef is a free man now. But what about the reputation that has been ruined by the Australian authorities? What about the minister saying that he did not like Haneef's character and so is revoking his visa? Mr Minister, it's not a matter of personal likes or dislikes that should decide some issue like this. Ok, while immigration is not a right one can claim, this justification only makes one roll on the floor with laughter and sarcasm. For all one knows, the Minister might have some dislike against most Indians or Muslims.
And this at a time, when Australia is promoting itself as a destination for Indians to go and work!!
Had such a thing happened with the Indian government, the Australians would have branded India as being too high handed or something on those lines.
Finally, the joke is upon you, Australia, the land of Kangaroos.
If it had not been for the human rights activists and the media, Dr Haneef might have been languishing in a god damn cell in an Australian prison, for just one simple reason-being a relative of two misguided men in the name of Islam and Jihad.
While terrorism should not be tolerated at any cost, it must also should be ensured that nobody should be framed.
It is high time for the world to look at curbing terrorism and justice in a better
sensible manner...or else, the world will become a much dangerous place to live in, if these issues are looked at from a religion point of view.

Nimitz Madness

Even before I say that the last 10 days was absolutely chaotically busy for me..first thing first..which brings me to...."I am going to boast about something now".!!!
Well...I was on board the US warship...USS Nimitz...there goes.Since I have blown my own trumpet now, I have decided to move onto do something better.
Three of us were taken on board the Nimitz on Jun 29 afternoon by a US Navy aircraft, the C12 Greyhound. The Greyhound is a very interesting vehicle, it has about 26 seats, the entry is from behind the aircraft, like you see on Discovery channel where paragliders do their traditional jumping routine. It has only two windows...very small ones and the photographers took both seats. It was a bit disappointing since I was taking the first ever flight in my life. But I cant even say I was disappointed since I dont think many ppl get the opportunity to travel by a war-aircraft on their first trip on a plane. Haha... I cant seem to stop boasting...after all every dog has its day!! anyway the horrible part comes a little later and all of u can have ur day...
The Greyhound is one really odd smelling, extremely noisy and dark aircraft.Plus you have to wear a helmet with goggles and some kind of a cup which covers the ears, which is extremely painful.
As the plane finally takes off after nearly two hours of waiting for the runway to be clear for us, we -almost all of us start taking pictures as the plane starts moving and the door closes.
Two hours later 5 30 p.m.- The C12 starts shaking in a very odd manner, it is about to land. It seems to me as if it is shaking in a manner that a dog gets rid of water on its body after it is bathed(hope u have seen a dog do that). We are told to tighten our seat belts and brace for the landing on the Nimitz.
The landing was well far from even being worse. I thought the flight crashed, though I dont no how it feels when a flight crashes, neither do I want to no. For a few seconds, it felt like that. A few seconds later the American sitting in front of us showed the Thumbs Up sign to tell us we landed safely and another bunch of Thumbs Up went up..that was us!! (Phew...)
Finally when the door of the aircraft was opened, we got to sounds of jets taking off from the 4.5 acre deck of the ship. Then we were taken to a room downstairs even as it was booming up on the deck. then we were made to swap our headgear for another set of t-shirts and headgear. Once again climb up a two flight of stairs or one..? I don remember. Cant imagine how ppl live on ships, especially on this one. Its so confusing. We watched the air exercises for about half hour or so and then once again taken to a different room. Our luggages arrive there and we head off for dinner. Dinner is not something I really got ready for. Finding something vegetarian was a bit difficult and once I found it, it was difficult to eat it. To top it all, I felt the ship wobbling(if its the rite word). After a terrible half hour of trying to eat something, I eat an apple. There is ice cream. I m happy. Only till I taste this and then even that goes into the bin. 'These americans are crazy,'I tell myself. Everything has the same taste.
We are then taken to meet some pilot. As we leave the place to meet him, I feel like vomiting. Everyone says I ll be alrite. We go to the pilot's room. As we are standing outside it, I insist I want to vomit. They arrange somebody to take me somewhere where I can vomit and then I throw up.. There U go...U can all be happy!! I m taken to the medical dept on the ship and given some pills.
As the others are talking to the pilot, I join in. The pilot says he has a music troupe on board. He plays the drums, three others play other instruments.They practice in a storeroom or something on the ship!!
We are informed that wee are somewhere below Sri Lanka. some 100 miles below Sri Lanka.
Then we meet the strike group(the air force)captain and the ship's captain.
The next morning we wake up at 5 30 to see the sun rise. but unfortunately the sun has already risen. We just take a look at the jets lined up on the deck, then I manage to talk to a couple of ppl. After an hour and half on the deck, we head for breakfast. This time, I m a bit prepared and head straight for corn flakes and some fruits!!
We are told that we have to return at 10 am. We just about manage to meet the only Indian american on board, a dentist, who speaks broken English.
Finally we are herded onto the Greyhound. We ask for water, they say they ll arrange for it to be sent to the aircraft.But we don get it..damn!!
This time as the aircraft takes off, we are in for a different shock. It takes off vertically almost throwing everyone off their seats. Fortunately, I have placed my leg on the seat infront of me-the gap between the seat in front and behind are very less. I don feel being thrown off. Almost after an hour and half as we land, we hold on tight to our seats, but we are fooled. It makes a proper landing like an aircraft. Back to Chennai. More work to do, following what happens around the Nimitz. Heavy work. The crew members descend on the city for some 'community work'. Many of my friends say they have some work to be done in their house and we should get some of these Americans to do it....Free labour, u see. Especially American labour.!! Finally as the ship leaves, I heave a sigh of relief. The madness has come to an end, for now!! And at the end of it all, somebody insists that I have to be called 'Nimi'. Hmmm

Two posts...Tooo very confused!!

It must be an absolute coincidence that two of the most hottest jobs in the country is up for grabs...not the right sentence,but still. And the two jobs have absolute chaos surrounding them at the current point of time...one is because of indecision of the part of those who is supposed to select him or her and the other is because he turned down and snubbed those who selected him.
Welcome to the chaos- the race to Rashtrapati Bhavan and the coach for the Indian Cricket team.
Not that both are very wonderful jobs..but still..The President deserves the respect of the nation and the Indian cricket coach will get the respect and the brickbats.
Still both the posts have lots in common.
1) Both are extremely high profile jobs, but neither have the absolute power to have their say in most matters.
2) Both work for the country...the President actually does, because he is the President(but I doubt it...considering the fact that he has to work with uncooperative so-called people's representatives in the parliament) and the Indian cricket coach because he is supposed to turn around the destiny of the nation with 11 highly paid poor performers!!
3)The President will get stiff opposition in case he pardons somebody or signs the office of profit bill..the Indian cricket coach will get reprimand from the board and the players in case he blasts a non-performing player with the media (but who cares man...he gets paid millions..so all the media glare is worth at the end of the day...and who knows he might get a better offer once his term with the Indian team is over)
4)And both get high security cover..the President because he is the President and needs to lead the country and the Indian cricket coach, because he needs to be protected from the people, each and every time the Indian team performs badly (I think he will easily qualify for z plus security)

While our Honourably President surely deserves a second term, our wise men (the politicians, if u dint figure that out) decided that no one should be given a second term,no matter how respectable his credentials are.Also, they want a secular, political person with impeccable credential for the post. WAIT! Secular and Political?? That doesn't sync..nor is it logical. A political person with impeccable record is fine..but how come a secular, political person?? Very funny!
So while the politicians are busy with rejecting one candidate or the other for the post, Mr Graham BMW...oh Sorry...Graham Ford, who currently is the coach of the Kent cricket club decided to show the bosses of Indian cricket, who exactly the Boss is.( Not Rajinikanth..I m not talking about his movie Sivaji-The Boss)
So by turning down the offer made by the BCCI, Ford has made sure that he can live in peace and make sure that Kent wins most of the matches and tournaments, which would just be a dream had he decided to coach our illustrious cricketers..who I learnt that do not know the basics of how to hold a cricket bat after playing for the country for so many years and need to be taught(finetuned!!) about it.

Whatever happens...interesting times are ahead as the tamasha (esp with Indian cricket) unfolds over the week.
Welcome to the Chaos..Once again!!

Did Helmet evolve from Hell Met???

I m not sure if the word helmet evolved from 'hell met'. But the new regulation making helmets compulsory for one year old (may be i m wrong..cud even be six to seven months child,since the Motor Vehicles Act doesnt prescribe an age and our beloved government servants too do not know) to the longest living person in Chennai, seems like hell for a few people.
One Sentence in The Hindu today caught my attention..it read something like 'What neurosurgeons could not make people do so far, one government order has.' It does not in anyway show that people in the state are law abiding..but just think of the embarrasment when a policeman pulls you over in full public glare and makes you pay a fine of Rs 100.Oh My God!! The whole world will come crashing down on them,cos they have been humiliated in public...one reason why the compulsory helmet rule has made people abide by it.
The trauma of being embarrased in public is much more than the trauma the person and his family will undergo in case he ends up in an accident and dies because of head injury or has a serious health problem due to it and they ll have to shell out huge sums of money to hospitals and doctors, who anyway mint money. Who Cares man? Let them get rich. A helmet at Rs 500 is too costly for a middle class person...but how the hell does the he or she from the middle class able to afford to buy a two wheeler. Seriously, if u are talking about being middle class and not able to afford a helmet..may be u should take the bus or the train. Oh but then they are too stuffy and crowded!!
Add to that the traffic jams..the unending honking by vehicles on the road, plus the sweat that will pour down the face and the hair on the head that they ll lose, seriously,losing hair is much worse than losing your life. Why give a damn!!
But the point why 97 per cent of the population is conforming to the rule is simply this : "Who wants to get caught not wearing a helmet..I don't want to pay Rs 100 fine , that too to a policeman".
Well neurosurgeons, sorry to inform you, but the state government just reduced your business!!!

The Media Laps it alll UP..!!

Kudos to the media. Greg Chappel and the Indian team have seemed to have hijacked the media for their own personal or professional reasons. And...the media both visual and print media are lapping it up. Anybody giving any information about the world cup debacle seems to have got some airtime or atleast space in a newspaper or website article. Well, a few have enough credibility and performance in their playing days to comment on the team's performance. I remember Krish Srikanth saying that Saurav Ganaguly should be dropped when the e-mail from Chappel was 'leaked' out. Now the same person bats for Ganguly!! well come on, we are not fools..former cricketers...but yes we are fools..cos as the saying for cricket goes '11 fools playing and 11 million fools watching' except that we are one billion people watching. People who will turn the cricketers into demi-gods one day and demons the next. Cos this is India...Indians who are so passionate about cricket that people have time to burn effigies, pelt stones on the houses of cricketers, demolish the compound walls of the houses they are building. Well, this shows something. Aren't these people supposed to go to work? Which brings us to another point..what happened to the National Rural Employment Guarantee Scheme, that promises 100 days employment to rural people. May be we should ask the Centre to extend it to these people who vandalise and resort to ugly gimmicks in the name of being cricket fanatics. Accepted that these are the people who have made the cricket board rich.
Wait..I m supposed to write about the media lapping it all up and not about cricket. Well, being from the media, that's what I have been doing all this while..trying to make sense of all that I have written above. Hope u have!!

Back...!! Not with a bang tho..!! :)

Welcome back. Well that's to me..not for u. After sometime of inactivity on my blog, I m back. Though, I dont have too much to write in this. Well, at this moment, what's there to write? The World cup of,course. Pakistan's loss, India's no show in the first match, Bob Woolmer's death or murder or whatever..Raikonnen's winning the first race in the F1 calendar this year, the heat in Chennai, MP's coming to blows in Parliament, Rahul Gandhi's statement on the Congress Party and the Babri demolition. Well!! Too many things happening. Too much to write and I m lazy to comment on all these.!! So there it goes. Everybody who has taken the time to read this post..Thanks for wasting your time reading this!! Go back to doing whatever you were doing.

Water

First things first about this topic. Deepa Mehta's Water should go down in Indian cinema history as a classic. Forget all the controversies that the film ran into and is at present also. Empty vessels make more noise..so all those empty vessels who have been trying to stop the film from being screened in some parts of the country..here's my advice. Go Watch the film. It is actually..in a sense controversial, set during the independence struggle, dealing about the freedom struggle that widows are going through. It's a struggle between traditions set down by the society and trying to live..yes trying to live one's own life.
In fact as Deepa Mehta has pointed out in a recent interview, why are we Indians afraid of showing and seeing the truth? It is a film that delves into what existed and we shouldn't be ashamed of it. It is a culture that existed during the independence era and still exists.
One scene in the movie should as a matter of fact, stand out. The scene where Gandhiji says we all believe that God is truth, but in reality Truth is God (Satya hi ishwar hai).
Just one suggestion to Deepa Mehta, stop naming your films like Water, Earth, Fire, which doesn't go down well with our people...try something like A,B,C,D,E, G stuff (well they name tamil movies like it, you might as well try something like that!!)
All said and done..controversies may come and go..but very good attempt at showing such a subtle concept.
Kudos to you,Mehta.

Smaaallll World

Well...I have been thinking about this for sometime now. The world is too small. Recent incidents have proved it to me and add to that technology and online communities like Orkut and Facebox where you run into people, who you might never again would have wanted to meet in your life and you end up scrapping them!! you run into friends of your friends who had met you at some point of time in their life and still manage to remember you at quite the most inopportune moment!!
Globalisation has also ensured that people and places are not actually that very far off.
Imagine what will happen if a telecaller for some product or service rings up when you are busy or sleeping (much to your obvious irritation and mental agony) is or was your friend in school or college or at present or is your son or daughter or niece or nephew or your neighbour who you love to hate from the bottom of your heart and where each call is monitored!!
Technological disasters(!!) like the cell phone can make one feel secure...but when you want to be left alone and need some privacy and some silence, (god forbade the person who calls or messages), can make one go wild with anger or irritation or even pity.
To make matters worse, the worst possible invention by mankind(oops!! i can explain....:) ) ..the internet has ensured that people are connected easily, but also terrorists and other anti-social people use the medium to create havoc and torture. While the world has become small (smmaalll worldd...should rhyme when you say it..like Kamal Hasan in the movie..i forgot the name...will get back on that), divorces, break ups and marriages also are happening technologically. Marriages happen through the telephone and internet.Certain countries allow divorces through telephone. So in case, you are thinking of a divorce, just make a search of the country that allows telephone divorce, go there and get it done, free from all the legal hassles that are there. You will atleast get to see a foreign country than go and sit in one dull, drab courtroom and hear orders being read out and seeing people being herded in and out like a pack of sheep!!
As you meet people in your life everyday through some medium...directly (eye to eye), telephone(ear to ear), internet, telephathy... elepathy,sympathy, empathy(just to rhyme with telepathy!!, your world starts to shrink in size. Each one brings in new thoughts, new ideas, new experiences(there are no good or bad experiences..i read in a book somewhere..don remember the name tho).The world starts to shrink, but experiences grow.
Soon, the world will be one big democracy. And the internet with its unrestricted capabilities will show the way to it.

Everything happens for a reason

Everything happens for a reason. Those who believe in destiny think so..Paulo Coelho says so in most of his books and it does seem true. Paulo Coelho says go with the natural flow of things..everything happens as it has to. May be I am writing this post because I am supposed to? Well I do not know. But then, the Alchemist is one damn good book that I have read in my life.
Coelho's theory does seem to be true, atleast to me.
And there is this email doing the rounds that says..some people come into ur life for a reason, some for a season and some for a lifetime.
Isn't that true? Because, each person and each situation is so perfectly placed for us to learn something or unlearn something, do or not to do something, fight or let go, become strong and face our fears or just succumb to pressure, reassess ourselves and see if we are heading in the right direction.
Well ...see the theory works out properly. Because, if somebody had not invented the internet, someone wouldn't have invented the blog and I wouldn't be spending my time jotting down my thoughts on the topic here rather than be sleeping.
I actually cannot figure out a reason for my blogging this..but then everything happens for a reason and may be I will get to know what that is!!

To B or Not to B

About 5 months left for the hot seat. The man who is occupying it now says he wants to go back to teaching and ignite the young minds. Rocket science is better and easier than the hot seat, he feels. So wat do u do next...put the man who quizzed other ppl on the hot seat sometime back as a candidate for the real hot seat..ya we are talking about the race for the post of the President of India..the hot seat at Rashtrapati Bhavan.

The so-called third front(SP,TDP and AIADMK plus other fringe parties...as if the country has already not been destroyed by these ppl...atleast the states they have ruled) says they ll put up the Big B or rather Amitabh Bachchan as a candidate for the post.

So currently the Big A is keen to go back to teaching. Since the A(Dr Abdul Kalam, by the way, in case I have confused you) is leaving ..its only logical for the B to follow(alphabetical order!!). But then he has got both the first two alphabets in his name Amitabh Bachchan ( A and B). Numerologists might be able to give an answer to this while astrologers might have a different point of view and what about asking vaastu shastra experts?

By the way Mr Amar Singh, can you explain wat happened to that poor souls at Nithari and why the Police force and ur government do not take responsibility for the incidents? Or how and why did ur govt give away arms to people? (This ain't America Mr Amar Singh)

With due credits to Amitabh, I believe he is better off acting and entertaining people than put in a cage of presidency and hear mercy pleas, arguments on quota, women's reservation bill apart from other political idiocy. He would surely make a wonderful 'role' model for people.

However, Amar Singh must be credited for making the media go ga-ga over this announcement. They got two days of wonderful bytes from people, smses, calls over whether he should contest for the post or not. Well, Amitabh himself 'dumbed' them down saying he was not worthy of such a post.

Well said, Mr Bachchan. I think people would like to see you on the silver screen almost every month, entertaining them than reading out vision statements on the eve of Independence Day and Republic Day, which nobody ever bothers to watch, thanks to the entertainment revolution.

My own funeral!!

Well this happened quite some time ago..sadly one of my colleagues committed suicide.hearing the news at about 11 pm in the night..we were spreading word to those who knew him..well..to my surprise one of my former colleagues called me up on my number and asked me if i had committed suicide..(he was extremely serious!!) probably he was mistaken cos both our names had sort of rhymed to this person and eventually he was shocked nevertheless.
Talk about arranging your own funeral!!

AXN Ban!! Hehehe

Hmmm...Well the Centre's ban on AXN till March seems to be a well thought out one as it will help Indians do more work, be productive and contribute to the PM's goal of achieving a GDP of 10 per cent.

After all, a show which has a name that runs like 'The World's sexiest Commercial' is condescending on the image of the country and the minds of the people of a country so steeped in tradition that shows like this can corrupt people's thoughts and actions. Terrorists and convicts will stop their maniacally driven actions. Politicians will stop being corrupt and insensitive.

People will stop having children, those who have extramarital affairs will begin to think for the good of the nation, actors like Shilpa Shetty will stop taking part in shows like 'Big Brother' where Indians will be called 'Pakis' by fellow 'housemates', beggars will stop begging, governance in the country will reach a new high. Even indifference among the Indian public will come to nil, everyone will become good natured,Bollywood will stop making movies like Corporate, there will be no prostitutes in the country, no rape, no moral policing, no husband and wife abuses.

There will be no border disputes with Pakistan and China, Tatas will return the land in Singur to farmers and drop their projects, everyone displaced in the Sardar Sarovar Dam project will be rehabilitated, there will be no communal riots in the country.

In fact, you wont find books like Kamasutra nor even the 'Mills and Boon' stuff. Newspapers will stop writing about dating, whether a first date will lead to a second and eventually marriage, and such stuff. A magazine called 'Maxim' will stop carrying pictures of 'sexy' women and even Malikka Sherawat clad very skimpily.

All this will happen because a show telecast at 11 pm in the night shows commercials which are supposed to be sexy and will affect the majority of the Indian population.

Serials that portray extra marital affairs, scheming, plotting another person's downfall, cricket shows where Mandira Bedi chatters away in an absolutely nonsensical manner, putting the even well knowledged cricket fan to shame with her 'expert commentary', movies that drip of vendetta, gore, violence, are supposed to educate the public, even children as most of it is in the local language and can easily be understood by everyone.

Kudos to Priyaranjan Das Munshi and his colleagues for saving the nation from disaster and poverty and helping the Prime Minister's goal of reaching 10 per cent GDP with a very small gesture of banning a channel.